[multichapter] Baby Blue: Part 4: Chapter 11

[thesecretdoor]

Title: Baby Blue: Part 4: Chapter 11
Pairing: JunDa
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 1073
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction, and only the words are mine.
Summary: All they wanted was each other, just to be together the way they once were. But now that they have it, is that still enough?

3rd November 2013

He watched in silence, his lip caught between his teeth as Ueda's eyes flickered back and forth between his face and the ring, a range of emotions playing out across his face, shock, confusion, happiness, anger, hope, sadness.

Eventually his eyes fixed on the ring, and wordlessly he closed the lid, placing the box back onto the table and nudging it back towards Taguchi. “I'm sorry, I can't accept this.”

He felt all the colour draining from his face, that was not the reaction he'd been anticipating. “That's your answer? No?”

“You think I don't want to?” Ueda asked, a spark of anger in his voice as his eyes raised to look at Taguchi's face. “Junno, we can't get married...”

“Why not?” Taguchi countered, feeling more and more like a spoiled child each second, his lips forming into a pout, tears building up behind his eyes.

“Because it's not legal...” Ueda answered with an almost cold expression.

“Not in Japan...” Taguchi started, but a glare from Ueda cut him off.

“Is that why you brought me here?” he demanded.

“No! I swear” Taguchi answered quickly. “I don't even know if it's legal here either...but there are places we could go...I mean not right now, but in the future we could...”

“What's the point?” Ueda countered. “It wouldn't mean anything back in Japan...”

“But it would mean something to us...” Taguchi argued, Ueda's words cutting wounds through his heart “It would be the two of us, making a commitment to each other...”

“Then lets do that...but why bother calling it marriage? Why bother with the ceremony and the trip? What can I promise you then that I can't right here and right now?”

“It wouldn't be the same...” he argued again, his voice weaker with the threatening tears.

“No it wouldn't, it would mean even less...it would be a fucking joke.”

He tried to hold back a sob as the tears spilled over “It would be important to me...Uepi, how can you say such mean things? How can you be so selfish?”

“I'm being selfish?” Ueda shouted. “You're the one that started this, setting it all up like this, like you're doing me some great honour by taking my hand in fucking marriage...and without even asking me how I would feel about it...”

“I'm asking you now.” Taguchi choked back.

“Fine.” Ueda snapped, standing up from table and looking around as though to steady his nerves “And you have my answer.”

He watched in silence as Ueda stormed away and slammed the bathroom door behind him, and then he sat frozen in place, only sporadic sniffles reminding him he was still alive as he concentrated on the sounds of Ueda readying himself for bed.

It was still early, too early to sleep, but it seemed Ueda had other reasons for running away from him, when Ueda was settled in bed, Taguchi could hear the muffled sound of desperate sobs. He wanted to go to him, to wrap his arms around him and comfort him, but once again he was the cause of their anguish.

He couldn't even understand how, he'd thought long and hard about this decision, and he'd paid attention to Ueda's opinions over the months they'd been together again, he had no reason to suspect Ueda would react so strongly against the idea of marriage. Sure he understood that it wouldn't be recognised legally in Japan, and that their status wouldn't be any different, but they would know, they would make promises to each other and bind themselves together in every way possible to them, and they would know that they had done it, and what it meant. He loved Ueda, and he didn't need some stupid government to recognise that, he just wanted them to be together, and to do what was right by themselves.

It wasn't until hours later that Ueda fell silent, the sobs making way to sniffles, which eased off into sighs, and then eventually nothing, just empty quiet. Taguchi got up from his seat, his own tears drying on his cheeks, and moved around mechanically, clearing away dishes, tidying up the small kitchen.

When he was done he headed into the bathroom to wash his face, and then to the cupboard to drag a thick blanket, taking it over to the sofa with him. He fell asleep almost instantly, but his dreams were a flurry of tormented images, beautiful sunsets, shattered glass, blood, tears, and Ueda sitting wordlessly at the piano, playing that sad song.

It was nearing daylight when he fully woke, exhausted from the overload of emotion, both before and during his sleep. He sat up to find Ueda already dressed, sitting at the table with the little black box in his hands.

“Tatsuya?” he asked gently, just to break the silence. He heard Ueda sniff quietly, but there was no reply, so he got up from the sofa and walked over to join him. “I'm sorry if I offended you.”

Ueda looked up at his face and then back to the ring before placing it back on the table. “I wasn't offended” he answered slowly.

“Then why were you so upset?”

Ueda took a deep breath and looked off to the side, his eyes red with what must have been fresh tears. “Look...can we not? I've had a really incredible time with you the past few days and I don't want to ruin what's left by fighting with you...”

“I don't want to fight either...I just want to understand...” Taguchi pushed.

“We'll talk about it later ok? You should get ready, we still need to go back into town and find a birthday present for Koki.”

He didn't argue the point further, just got up silently and headed into the bathroom to shower.

For the rest of the day he gave Ueda the space that he needed, they spoke, but it was in quiet voices, short clipped sentences, even as they sat down to eat in the cute little restaurant they'd been wanting to visit since they first saw it. Then all too soon they had to head back to the cabin and pack, and then set off back to the airport, back home.

Ueda had been right, something had changed, Taguchi had changed something again, just like the last time. It was all he could do to hope that this time at least the consequences might not be so bad.

Chapter 10 | Chapter 12

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*hides* curveball  >_< but you seriously didn't see it coming? Since when did I let things be easy for them? As for why Ueda doesn't want to get married...well hopefully that'll get explained, though I'm still in the process of writing it >_< I'm going to be away next weekend, if I get the time to I'll post an update before I leave (so maybe Thursday night) if not then next week for sure ^__^ Thanks for sticking with me guys!!!

Comments

[sugiex.livejournal.com]

Yay for update but boo for rejection ):

I thought you were finally kind to JunDa for once </3 Looking forward to the next chapter and have a nice holiday!

[tat-fan-luv.livejournal.com]

I knew it! I knew Uepi was going to say 'no'! I think he's afraid that Junno is going to leave him again, that he'll think he's gotta stay out of commitment not choice. He doesn't realize junno wants to be as close to him as possible...either that or something happened in the past that makes Uepi not want to get married But i knew he was going to say 'no'! and that was so fast thank you so much for the update you made my week!

[pandanyan.livejournal.com]

Oh what a curveball!!! >< You're lucky Lyan posted something fluffy or else this would've just turned me into a wreck.

First of all *huggles Junno* Aww poor thing, I feel you ><....but then again I should huggle Uepi too...GAH! *huggles both*

I think I can vaguely guess why Ueda's all against marriage and stuff but really he should talk it out with Junno soon. I understand where Junno's coming from in this too though, I just hope he's not too broken over it.

I really really hope they can talk it out before things start to get busy! (Gah what is it with them going on trips and having it end so bitterly? At this rate I'm sure Ueda wouldn't want to go on another trip ever again ><)

Either way I'm still glad to see an update~~ ^w^ Imagine, just yesterday I was re-reading this part from the start (just this part lol I'd want to read the entire series from the start but then I just won't have time to do anything else xD) so it's really great to have an update from you today~ ^^

I'll be looking forward to the next one~ (despite the possibility of angst..oh well ><) Thanks for sharing~ *huggles*

[racanai.livejournal.com]

I shouldn't be happy about them being sad, should I? XD

I wonder what changes to their relationship this will bring. It seems like Ueda rejected Taguchi because he wants it to mean something where they live, but that's the ideal situation to start thinking too much... I see angst ahead! ♥

[despygurl.livejournal.com]

I know you would do this ;~;
but... but... but ;~;

I just hope they'd make it together again >____<

*she tries desperately to click on the "Chapter 12"* Why was this not working???? ;~;

[lisa loftsdóttir (from livejournal.com)]

aww why u hiding sweetie
i kinda knew they would do this
have a great holiday and
thanks for the update =)